Matthew and I have our own special time with the Bible away from our children. A time we can dig in deep and not have to explain anything. :) It is very romantic and we see each other right to the soul. :)
This is what I wrote during our study time last night. It pertains so much to what we are going through in our journey. I love when God does that. :)
I hope it blesses you as it did us last night. We both teared up!
Our family has been through a job loss and times of great financial woe since May 2009. It took this catastrophe to show me how truly blessed we were. It was wonderful to pay our bills on time, to have money for whatever I wanted to buy at the grocery store. I was very thankful for these things, but I was too comfortable. It took the fear of our future, and the prospect of having to rely on the Lord to open my heart to "treasuring my blessings" and "meditating" on the goodness and greatness of the Lord. Mary had this moment in Luke 2:19 (But Mary kept all these things, and pondered them in her heart.), this moment when the Lord's ways accumulated into one perfect moment for her heart. That is what has happened for me.
Every help we sought out was foiled. We couldn't have food stamps because we made to much on unemployment and we had a saved $2,000 dollars in the bank for Eli's COBRA payments. We couldn't have unemployment until we passed the over $2,000 dollars we received from Matthew's old job as an incentive for staying through the end, even though this money was SAVED to pay for COBRA insurance for our type one diabetic son. And Matthew found a job making $300 more a month than unemployment before that happened. Matthew's checks the last month at his old job were half of what we were used too. We also couldn't get utility help. Every help out there for us was not available to us.
When I say we were on our own, scared, and stressed, we were. And then weeks went by, the Lord blessed us. There is no explanation for our good fortune. He was and still is making wine from water, and refilling our bread and fish baskets out of NOTHING!
This has caused me to MEDITATE, to TREASURE him! I know that He has it, He has us, and we have only to bask in his goodness, and blessings.
Since I have been taken to a place where only God can shine I have grown in my Faith of him. I KNOW without a doubt that I only need him.
It benefits me in so many ways. I can know in my darkest hours that he will be there. I can feel him all around me and in me. He WILL make a way.
My perspective on Him and in my life is easier for me to grasp because of this. Each time he saves me my heart remembers more and I have more wisdom for the next heart-attack moment. Our salvation may start with Him saving us from hell once, but he saves us again and again with each lesson he imparts to us. Thankyou, JESUS!
When I sit and imagine Mary with her sweet baby Jesus in her arms I tear up. I can see her caressing him and holding his hands. I think of how she marvels over his big role, but her heart holds him as any mothers would. I think that God knew a young girl named Mary would be a fierce and loving protector. It is no mistake he would choose to bless a sweet mortal woman's womb with the greatest gift ever known to men.
I think of how when I was pregnant or hold my freshly born baby that I like to keep it secret, even from my family.
Maybe God is like this too? Only a select few knew WHERE he was, and yes many knew of the prophesy, but Jesus could have come to us in ways far more superior than he did. He could have come as a giant and powerful man GOD, not an infant all sweet and soft, with little swirly baby hair.
But God sent Him in an open and very risky body. In our Saviors weakest moments God provided from nothing. It was all his and he made everything work for his only Begotten Son. Mary and Joseph were poorer than my family is now. Jesus was placed in a very simple home. I think it is neat that God will go will he asks us to go. He will not ask of you anything he himself will not do.
When I think of the real and honest life qualities of Jesus from start to finish while he was here as a man I am surprised to remember he was a sweet REAL baby who needed his mother, craved his mother, like all the infants before and after him. How blessed Mary was and no wonder she treasured her blessings and was in awe of the goodness and greatness of God. After all, she could have forgone the journey of a lifetime. She could have been safe and followed the laws of the land in her time. She could have been normal, married like normal, and held a normal baby in the normal household! But God gave her an indescribable life with the best child ever!
3 comments:
Beautiful.
Chelita,
Thanks for sharing your heart about what God has shown you. It has really helped me out, because, right now, we are in about the same place. We are looking at my husband's job very possibly not being there in the next few months (his company is going through a buy-out), and we, too, are faced with insurance issues for our little man. My husband and I have worried over this much! But it was comforting to read what God showed you about how He cares for His own no matter the circumstances. So thank you.
Nicole :-)
Wow....thanks, I needed this today!
*Hugs*
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